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Storage Blogwars and the Vendor Fight Club

Recently there has been a noticeable increase in what can only be described as "bare knuckled brawling" between many of the Executive Vendor Bloggers.  See the following ByteandSwitch article –

Storage Smackdown article link

This brawling is not your typical civilised discussion, or neutered exchange seen at the likes of Storage Expo and SNW.   Oh no, this is something altogether better.  The guys involved have taken their jackets off, stripped down to their pants rolled up their sleeves and are swinging in all directions.  A bit like a Royal Rumble if you will, only not rehearsed or faked.  Actually may be more of a cross between the UFC and a Royal Rumble.  These guys are landing real punches and attempting to cause real injuries.

The cool thing is though, these brawls are great fun to watch, and more than occasionally, very insightful. 

Vendors and Karate

You ever wonder if Karate is actually of any value as a self-defence skill?  Or if its better than Wrestling, or Kick-boxing or may be Ju-Jitsu?  If you have, you could go and pay your local Karate Dojo or Wrestling club etc a visit and ask them which is best, or if any are of worth.  But its fairly predictable what response you would get.  A better way would be to pitch the styles against each other in a no-holds barred free-for-all and see which comes out on top.  If you're interested, go and watch the UFC, or any other mixed martial arts competition.  Its eye opening and great fun to watch.  Sorts the men from the boys.

The same could be said about Storage.  You ever wonder who is best out of the likes of – EMC, Hitachi, IBM, NetApp, 3Par?  Sure, you could ask your local sales guy from each of the vendors, but we all know what response to expect form them.  Better than that, throw them in cage together, with only a few rules, and see who comes out on top.  If you're interested, start reading the blogwars!  It's also eye opening and great fun to watch.  Oh and you can pitch in yourself if you feel "man" enough ;-)

Sadly there are very few knock-outs, and there is usually no clear cut winner.  All parties raising their hands in victory when the bell rings and leaving it to the judges score card (thats you).  But you're almost guaranteed five rounds of great action and a deep insight into what each has to offer.

The Blogsphere is the Cage

The Blog is crucial to the survival and growth of this Vendor Fight Club.  The Vendor Execs seem free from the shackles of corporate restraints and all-seeing-eye of the Legal Department.  However, the legal guys are no doubt lurking in the crowd somewhere, so some rules are in place, its not quite gloves off no-holds barred, but its as good as we're likely to get at the moment and far better than your standard Press Release.  The gloves being worn offer very little padding, and it's quite often brutal and not for the fainthearted.  But like I say, its highly entertaining (if you like your storage) and more importantly, educational.

All Good Fighters Need a Nickname 

So just as many of the great fighters of the UFC and other fight sports have nick names -

  • Randy "The Natural" Couture,
  • "The Iceman" Chuck Liddell
  • Michael "The Count" Bisping

……..

I figure we need some names for the bloggers involved – Ive tried to be civilised so these are not too harsh.  Here' a few that came immediately to mind -

**UDPATED with recommends from readers**

There are so many more who belong on the list, and I'm sure there are better names.  Feel free to pitch in with any thoughts, especially on the nicknames……

I'm glad its not Pay-Per-View blogwars though, coz I'd probably have to get my credit card out and sign up – its often that good!

Nigel

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9 Responses

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  1. Chris M Evans says

    Nigel

    How about Barry “The Equaliser” Burke & Barry “The Crooner” Whyte?

  2. snig says

    LOL, very nice!

    Don’t forget Jon "The Playa Hater" Toigo.  Just joking with ya Jon….

  3. marc farley says

    Great idea Nigel, but being about smackups and all – it was lame! I mean, Sweet Pea Hitz barely has anything to say anymore and he always sucked at smack. 

    Touch of Sleep Hu writes a bit more often but he's usually a no show where blog interactions are concerned. 

    And Claus "who's he?" Mikkelson?. 

    You are really showing an HDS bias – and they had to hire Tony the Assassin Asaro to help them get some punches thrown. 

    So I'm going to start with me and name a few others:

    Marc the Mangalar Farley

    Charles Roundhouse Hollis

    Alex Pretty Boy McDonald 

    Jesus Freakin Zilla

    Val Brass Balls Bercovici

    Barry (has) Two Shoes Whyte

    Barry the Benchmark Burke

    Tony Late for Dinner Pearson

    Steve Smokin' Somethin Todd

    Quiet Kostadis Roussos

  4. Nigel Poulton says

    Nice!  Some quality nicknames coming through…….

    No HDS bias intended Marc.  I genuinely think Hu comes across as a gent.  Oh and I suppose he already has a nickname given him by Barry the Equalizer Burke – "HHSNBN".

    My nickname for Claus was more about him being mysteriously missing for a while.  It was in no way meant as he is back with a bang.  If anyting, the HDS bloggers squeak politely rather than bang.

    Oh and if it was a cage fight, my money would not be on the HDS guys ;-)

  5. Alex McDonald says

    Pretty! Yup, that’s me. Even a solid landed blow on the kisser doesn’t leave a mark,,, or were you implying summat else?
    What’s your cage handle, btw?

  6. Nigel Poulton says
     

    The idea was to keep it to vendor bloggers, but since you ask the question, one possibility springs to mind -

    Nigel "The Godfather" Poulton.  Based on the fact I have people come and talk to me for help and advice for their HDS and HP XP kit that they don't/cant get from the authorities.

    But I suppose there are a few out there who might suggest along the lines of Nigel "The HDS Lover" Poulton.  Not sure where they get this idea from, the fact is, I love good storage.  I just happen to have some (read "little") skill in HDS kit.

    Oh and blame Marc the Mangalar (should that be Mangler) Farley for the "Pretty Boy" Moniker.

  7. Stephen2615 says

    I have given up on reading all thats out there as I actually have lots of work to do.  Somehow or another, some people seem to find the time to get into zillions of discussions on blog sites that either means they don’t do any meaningful work or they are employed to keep the name of EMC or IBM in the news.  In particular, Chuck "The Undertaker or I’m an industry-wide reviewer" Hollis must do nothing except waffle on and offer his 2 cents worth everywhere.  Seriously, considering the millions of articles and blog comments, how on earth can he keep this up?  Work 25 hours a day?  Doesn’t type anything but has a hundred steno’s capturing his every word and speed typing it to the web..
     
    Really, no one of imporantance really gives a toss about what blogs from vendors thinks.  They know its selfless marketing.  And who are generally the first to get booted in a recession?  Marketing and middle management.

  8. Nigel Poulton says

    Granted there is blatant marketing involved, but I know of no better forum or place to find interesting and often engaging discussion.  No doubt that you have to filter through the bias, thats a given.  Do you know of any better forum where you can talk and debate relatively openly with senior folks at the vendors?

    As for some of them attempting big up their own employers and keep their wares in the media spotlight…. well obviously.  At the end of their day they are not going to bite the hand that feeds them.  You just need that pinch of salt close by….

    As for the frequency of posting from some of them.  Well, I personally go through phases of increased posting and phases of quiet.  Im not necessarily less busy when I'm posting and commenting more frequently,  The times when Im posting more frequently are usually when I spend time travelling on train or plane and have time to spend with my laptop.  Although I agree, some people either have a far greater capacity than me (not difficult) or more hours in the day.  But if its your job to be on top of things like that, then its entirely possible to produce huge amounts of "content".  And at the enf od the day, like you say, this stuff is often good marketing and sales "content".

Continuing the Discussion

  1. Online Storage Optimization » Blog Archive » Storage News & Views - Week of March 9 linked to this post on March 11, 2009

    [...] to be mentioned by the mysterious NoHype in that comment field.) There’s an element of what Ruptured Monkey is calling “bare knuckled brawling” among vendors that’s getting… well, you [...]